Lost promises
Posted: Tue Jul 20, 2021 12:53 pm
A lonely graveyard on top of a hill, bahind what looks like a temple to the lady of misteries, Mystra.That is the place where his friend is resting now. Kelian walks up between the tombstones, searching for a name, his armor has been hidden under a long brownish cape..not like the average people of Toril would recognise Solarian steel but he didn't want to catch someone attention. He traveled far across the Coast in those few days and his search leaded him there, stopping infront of the tombstone with a simple phrase write on it
"Here lies Sir Fenwick, devoted servant of our lady"
Once again, his expression did not flinch nor changed, he has become good in expecting the worst and was prepared for that.Even so, his heart skipped a beat from that sting of pain. Closing his eyes he lower his hood and kneel in front of the tomb
"..greetings, sir Fenwick" making a faint smile " i am sorry for being this late, but..i am back. There is..so much that i'd wish to say. I came back here looking for you, for sister Ashenie, Alarielle and many more..but of course...too much time has passed."
taking a little deep breath from the nose he pauses, to put a forget-me-not in front of the stone
"...i guess you all were quite mad when i left. Leaving only my books behind with my discoveries, proofs and leads to keep on the fight.Sending few letters, saying a "maybe one day i will come back"... I wonder sometimes if you ever used them, if they were of any help...if i was of any help."
slowly, he moves to sit down with his kneels up in front of the tomb, his tone a somber and calm one, like is talking to an old friend in front of a dirnk
"From what i know, noone searched for me, noone wondered where i ended up or what i was doing... i came back into this world, so different from the one i knew, hoping to find some answers...to see if i really did fail you all in your eyes. I ended up in the planes, you know?...i managed to speak with feys, celestials..fiends, devils...i believe you would have had some fun there."
making another faint smile, he closes his eyes before his expression becomes more neutral
"...you didn't deserve this. I was there, i have seen the sacrifices you had to do to help people..the blood you spilled and poured to save innocents from the spiders and fiends...and how did they repay you?...a little grave, in a forgotten place...i never understood the game you were playing...you were in the Court and could had changed things, oppose to the corruption and cruelty...not blaming you at all, of course. How could i? i witnessed that and just pretend to not see it...lost in my own pain and the greater enemy in front of us. I still hated it thought"
The aasimar opens his eyes once again to look at the grave and shakes his head
"I wanted to destroy it. That sick game of power that was making everyone go mad, turning them all into corrupted versions, parodies, of what they should had stood for...i never said it openly, but you are included. I respect you and still think of you as a dear friend, but for how much i can understand the need for what you were doing...dealing with thayans and zhentarim,putting on a smile for the Radiants and the Dariuses just to keep up appearances..i cannot accept it. Again, i am not blaming you...many knew of the corruption moving inside the Gate and noone did nothing. We are all culprits, if i was seeking for one, on how things went"
Rises a bit his gaze towards the blue sky, few clouds moving on the horizon while Lathander was slowly reaching his zenit, not staring directly at it for the bright light
"You know, Sirion was right. Also Lylan,Vanira...my actions leaded me where i am now and i reaped what i have sow...the last two were cruel in saying those words, but funny thing?...Shazy, you remember her?..she turned to a better leaf. Not taking any merit, mind you, she did all by herself...yet, i cannot stop question myself "would she be here, like this, if i didn't met her? if i didn't extend my hand to her and just turned her into an enemy like everyone did?"..she reached where is now thanks to her own effort and i could not prise her enough for it. I fear am falling in love with her uniyelding spirit."
He shrugs a bit then looking at the grave again
"Saying i fear, because i am already in love, with all my heart and soul, with a beautiful Deva,Meskhenet, that helped me find the will to fight again. I am blessed with her presence each day, i have good friends that are there when i feel the need to talk with someone, like Argent, Saiyuu, Danae, Dace,Dora,Lazuli,Starlight...are so many that sometimes i fear i am not giving enough and right time to each of them. I am still fighting. For them, with them, against very similar foes that we once faced on this very prime. I am using what i learned throught those months of pain in this place to help them however i can...i reap what i sow, and i could not be happier."
Slowly stands up again stretching his arms towards the sky, looking at it while continues
"I try my best to not make them sad or hurt them...i still fail, from time to time, and one example is exactly Shazy. I will try hard again, once more, hoping to not make a mess again...probably things will never be the same, but i will strive for the brighter days that once i have seen for the people of this land.Yet, i will never fight again for this prime."
Looks slowly back on the tomb with the neutral expression still on his face, making a soft sigh from the nose
"After all i have seen, after all the memories that i will probably never be able to forget, i cannot trust them ever again.You know, i discovered why celestials and denizens of the upper planes refuse to waste time on this ball...why we must always seek their advice throught many difficulties...i almost wanted to cry the first time i heard it and i was almost tempted to go to lady Alyssia and scream it on her face.Who am i kidding, i would had probably stare at her and say nothing...but she is gone, like everyone i knew. Maybe, just maybe, i could give another chance to this world, hoping they learned from their past mistake and give them a third chance...but why do so, when i have a home to go back to and friends and beloved that are waiting for me?"
Bowing his head a little he pulls up his hood once more
"Goodbye, my old friend. I hope you are happier, now, in the realm of your lady. Maybe, one day, i will see you again while planeswalking in Mechanus."
"Here lies Sir Fenwick, devoted servant of our lady"
Once again, his expression did not flinch nor changed, he has become good in expecting the worst and was prepared for that.Even so, his heart skipped a beat from that sting of pain. Closing his eyes he lower his hood and kneel in front of the tomb
"..greetings, sir Fenwick" making a faint smile " i am sorry for being this late, but..i am back. There is..so much that i'd wish to say. I came back here looking for you, for sister Ashenie, Alarielle and many more..but of course...too much time has passed."
taking a little deep breath from the nose he pauses, to put a forget-me-not in front of the stone
"...i guess you all were quite mad when i left. Leaving only my books behind with my discoveries, proofs and leads to keep on the fight.Sending few letters, saying a "maybe one day i will come back"... I wonder sometimes if you ever used them, if they were of any help...if i was of any help."
slowly, he moves to sit down with his kneels up in front of the tomb, his tone a somber and calm one, like is talking to an old friend in front of a dirnk
"From what i know, noone searched for me, noone wondered where i ended up or what i was doing... i came back into this world, so different from the one i knew, hoping to find some answers...to see if i really did fail you all in your eyes. I ended up in the planes, you know?...i managed to speak with feys, celestials..fiends, devils...i believe you would have had some fun there."
making another faint smile, he closes his eyes before his expression becomes more neutral
"...you didn't deserve this. I was there, i have seen the sacrifices you had to do to help people..the blood you spilled and poured to save innocents from the spiders and fiends...and how did they repay you?...a little grave, in a forgotten place...i never understood the game you were playing...you were in the Court and could had changed things, oppose to the corruption and cruelty...not blaming you at all, of course. How could i? i witnessed that and just pretend to not see it...lost in my own pain and the greater enemy in front of us. I still hated it thought"
The aasimar opens his eyes once again to look at the grave and shakes his head
"I wanted to destroy it. That sick game of power that was making everyone go mad, turning them all into corrupted versions, parodies, of what they should had stood for...i never said it openly, but you are included. I respect you and still think of you as a dear friend, but for how much i can understand the need for what you were doing...dealing with thayans and zhentarim,putting on a smile for the Radiants and the Dariuses just to keep up appearances..i cannot accept it. Again, i am not blaming you...many knew of the corruption moving inside the Gate and noone did nothing. We are all culprits, if i was seeking for one, on how things went"
Rises a bit his gaze towards the blue sky, few clouds moving on the horizon while Lathander was slowly reaching his zenit, not staring directly at it for the bright light
"You know, Sirion was right. Also Lylan,Vanira...my actions leaded me where i am now and i reaped what i have sow...the last two were cruel in saying those words, but funny thing?...Shazy, you remember her?..she turned to a better leaf. Not taking any merit, mind you, she did all by herself...yet, i cannot stop question myself "would she be here, like this, if i didn't met her? if i didn't extend my hand to her and just turned her into an enemy like everyone did?"..she reached where is now thanks to her own effort and i could not prise her enough for it. I fear am falling in love with her uniyelding spirit."
He shrugs a bit then looking at the grave again
"Saying i fear, because i am already in love, with all my heart and soul, with a beautiful Deva,Meskhenet, that helped me find the will to fight again. I am blessed with her presence each day, i have good friends that are there when i feel the need to talk with someone, like Argent, Saiyuu, Danae, Dace,Dora,Lazuli,Starlight...are so many that sometimes i fear i am not giving enough and right time to each of them. I am still fighting. For them, with them, against very similar foes that we once faced on this very prime. I am using what i learned throught those months of pain in this place to help them however i can...i reap what i sow, and i could not be happier."
Slowly stands up again stretching his arms towards the sky, looking at it while continues
"I try my best to not make them sad or hurt them...i still fail, from time to time, and one example is exactly Shazy. I will try hard again, once more, hoping to not make a mess again...probably things will never be the same, but i will strive for the brighter days that once i have seen for the people of this land.Yet, i will never fight again for this prime."
Looks slowly back on the tomb with the neutral expression still on his face, making a soft sigh from the nose
"After all i have seen, after all the memories that i will probably never be able to forget, i cannot trust them ever again.You know, i discovered why celestials and denizens of the upper planes refuse to waste time on this ball...why we must always seek their advice throught many difficulties...i almost wanted to cry the first time i heard it and i was almost tempted to go to lady Alyssia and scream it on her face.Who am i kidding, i would had probably stare at her and say nothing...but she is gone, like everyone i knew. Maybe, just maybe, i could give another chance to this world, hoping they learned from their past mistake and give them a third chance...but why do so, when i have a home to go back to and friends and beloved that are waiting for me?"
Bowing his head a little he pulls up his hood once more
"Goodbye, my old friend. I hope you are happier, now, in the realm of your lady. Maybe, one day, i will see you again while planeswalking in Mechanus."